Tagged: gene albamonte

Tunneling, by Gene Albamonte

Tunneling, by Gene Albamonte

posted on June 2nd, 2011 by Nathan Holic

15 Views of Orlando: Part 1 (of 15)

Location: Town House Restaurant, Downtown Oviedo

15 Views of Orlando has been stolen from the tubes of the Internet and is now in book form, due out on 1/31/12. Read the first story in full, get hooked, and pre-order it here.

I didn’t realize how much I loved the guy until he was gone. Not only that, but I didn’t even know if he was coming back in one piece. So there I was, thinking about my friend (infantry, Afghanistan)—who might as well be the brother I never had—while standing out in the back of the Town House Restaurant with a waitress named Eve, who gently balanced a cup against my lips and poured water into my mouth because I was too busy throwing a tennis ball against the wall.

“This is impossible,” she said, rolling her eyes. “The ball is solid and the wall is solid.” She said this as if I didn’t know that already. I told her I wasn’t stupid, despite the fact that I felt pretty stupid. I recently got laid off (editorial assistant, newspaper). I was 32 years old. I was a dishwasher. I moved back in with my mother.

Regarding the tennis ball: I was testing something Brian had told me twenty years ago, something called quantum tunneling. I had been throwing the ball since early that morning. I was waiting for it to pass through the wall. Brian had told me, when we were twelve, that a ball was made of wave functions and, according to quantum physics (and his father who was a physicist), those waves can spill into and through a solid wall. Because of this, there was a chance that the entire ball could pass through to the other side if it was thrown against the wall enough times. So I wanted to throw it as many times as I could each day before getting back to work. Eve said she’d help out. She’s a good person. I knew Brian would like Eve, too. She was sarcastic and silly and sometimes she flicked rubber bands at people just to get their attention.

I threw the ball until the diner opened for business, but nothing happened.

*

The following morning, I went running before my shift. The good news: I was running farther and faster than ever, which I knew would make Brian proud. He was always there for me, always trying to make me a better person. Healthier, smarter, more optimistic. People would pay good money to have his optimism. He was the kind of guy who would cut the glass in half and say how it was completely full.

The bad news: I was diagnosed with jogger’s hematuria, which is what doctors call it when your urine is tinged with blood due to your bladder walls banging against each other like a couple idiots. When the doctor told me this, I thought of cymbals clashing together, like my insides were having a parade. Peeing didn’t feel good when this happened either. Most people would stop running after being diagnosed with jogger’s hematuria, but not me. During my runs, I pictured my bladder walls banging into each other, imagined the capillaries within them exploding like tiny fireworks releasing little sparks of blood.

The good news: the house Brian grew up in was on my route. The bad news: it wasn’t the same house. His old house had been knocked down several years ago to make room for a larger, newer house. Some would see this as a tragedy, but, to be honest, the new house was pretty damn nice. I’d live in it. If I could have afforded it. If I still had a career, something that didn’t involve the words ‘dish’ and ‘washer.’

Growing up, Brian and I had become so many things in that old house. Spies, novelists, detectives, musicians, boxers, songwriters, television hosts, ninjas, news reporters, scientists, directors, writers, architects. We’d roll out a sheet of butcher paper in his living room and design roller coasters with a pencil, drawing twists and turns as the room filled with the scent of all-day gravy—crushed tomatoes, garlic, sweet pork.

I ran down the old road that used to be just a blinking yellow light dangling like a citrine, but was now a full traffic light. I passed what used to be an empty stretch of grassland and was now home to a mall with a movie theater. The old was still mixed in, though. Near the Town House, there was still the plateau of one-story businesses rising above the sidewalks, and there were still places where you could catch the scent of cow patties scattered within a field bordered by chickenfence. If you went deep enough, you could still find a home turned into a tire depot with masses of black rubber stacked in the yard like mountains at dusk.

*

After our shift, we went out back and I threw the ball. We were out there till 2 a.m. I told her about the time Brian and I sat in his backyard and cut our palms with a knife and rubbed our hands together and became blood brothers. Then we were quiet for a while until, looking at the tennis ball, I said, “Maybe you’re right. Maybe this is impossible.”

“It’s fun anyways,” she said, and then she sat down next to me with her legs crossed, looking up at the stars. If only he could see us. If only I could take a picture of that moment to show him when he came back: the two of us, Eve and I, outside the Town House Restaurant in Oviedo, the night heavy and black and blue, things chirping, not a human in sight. There was the thud of the ball and then there was the happy thought that pieces of the ball—impossibly small—were passing through the wall and into the diner and the idea that, one day, the entire ball could pass through if I just kept throwing it.

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About the Author:

Gene Albamonte graduated with an MFA in Creative Writing from the University of Central Florida. In 2010, he attended the Sirenland Writers Conference. Thus far, his fiction has appeared or is forthcoming in Southern Indiana Review, Clapboard House and Fragmentation + Other Stories—an anthology published by Burrow Press. He was a finalist in Glimmer Train‘s January 2008 Family Matters competition and earned an Honorable Mention in the April 2008 Family Matters competition. He writes a weekly column for PANK Magazine’s blog and two columns for Burrow Press’s blog. Read more at www.mynameisgene.com.

I Believe I’m A Hypocrite

I Believe I’m A Hypocrite

posted on March 9th, 2011 by Jana Waring

I’m a hypocrite. There I said it.

I don’t want to be a hypocrite, but I can’t help it. There’s this little thing called “lack of time” that keeps letting me (and possibly you) down. What I mean by all this is that I haven’t written a legit blog (for the very same blog that I ask all of our contributors to commit to each week) in a very long time. I’ve made every excuse.

After Urban ReThink opens, I’ll do it. No, after our book release party, I’ll do it. After I go to the gym, maybe. After this phone call. After this email.  And now, I’m already planning cancellations of my blog writing before it even happens, like after this trip to St. Pete I booked because I need a vacation from all the blogs I haven’t written yet. Anyways, the urge to write is creeping up upon me and it’s you, the contributors of this blog, that are inspiring me.

Last night, I went to Tod Caviness’ Speak Easy at Will’s Pub and was pleased to see so many people willing to risk the health of their lungs for good prose. I was especially excited to unite with the Fragmentation family. Ryan Rivas, Gene Albamonte and Hunter Choate were all in attendance. I knew Ryan’s short about God and South Beach would be funny and great because I got to preview it beforehand. But what I didn’t see coming was Gene’s performance.

Below is Gene’s written Speak Easy contribution. I begged him to let me post it as my blog today. I can’t stop reading it over and over again. I can’t stop imagining him on the stage, reading, pointing, smiling. I’m jealous. I’m thankful. But most importantly I’m inspired. I’m gonna stop making excuses and I’m gonna start writing… right after I post this blog and read Gene’s short one more time.

HERE’S WHAT I BELIEVE
By Gene Albamonte

I don’t believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of Heaven and Earth. But I’ll tell you what I do believe in.

I believe in the human spirit, but not spirit like some ethereal thingy that dwells within the shell of our skin. I don’t believe our skin is a shell, but if it were a shell, I believe it would be a conch shell, because ‘conch’ is a funny word, and it’s funny how we are all going to die some day. No, I believe in the idea that we humans are all capable of doing more than we think. All of us. Every last one. Except for this guy I know, Tim. That guy’s an asshole.

I don’t believe Jesus Christ is the son of God, but I do believe in sliced bread. I believe in cinnamon, 2/3 cup of milk, 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract and 2 eggs. I believe I’m hungry for French toast.

I believe we know the enemy and it is us, which you’d think would be a good thing because who knows us better than us? But actually, it’s a bad thing. Because as it turns out, we don’t know ourselves very well at all. Or at least that’s what both my psychiatrists told me.

I believe all work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy, but, to be honest, I think Johnny was dull in the first place. Isn’t that why Mary-Beth left him? Sure, she said it was because she needed some time to herself, but that wasn’t it. I believe Mary-Beth learned that you can love someone and, at the same time, love someone else. Mary-Beth used to believe in soul mates—that there’s one special person just for each of us. Now she believes there are many special people for each of us and we’re left to choose which one we’ll stay with. She chose Johnny, then she chose to break his heart and now every time Johnny gets caught in the rain, he cries, because it reminds him of the time he and Mary-Beth were sticking Blackjack firecrackers in oranges and lighting the wicks and throwing them into the sky to watch the pulp rain down. They did that for ten minutes straight and then it started raining and they made a run for it. They had to stop every now and then to catch their breath, they were laughing so hard. They laughed and looked at each other and made promises with their eyes, and now she’s gone. Now she’s with Kevin, who I believe has gonnorhia.

I believe the children are our future. I believe we should teach them well. However, I don’t believe we should let them lead the way. They’re just kids, for Christ’s sake.

I believe in the power of cranberry juice.

I don’t believe in unity or the trinity, but maybe we can meet somewhere in the middle and call it bi-nity? Binity? Two nities, is what I’m trying to say.

I believe I’m a dog person. Not in the sense that I prefer dogs, but that I’m actually part human, part dog, specifically my right foot, which is a paw.

I believe it when I see it, so I believe nothing in pitch dark.

I don’t believe in God, but I believe in you… and… you. And you.

Whenever someone says, “How many times do I have to tell you?” I believe you should say “32” before they finish the rest of their sentence.

I don’t believe in the immaculate conception or the holy spirit or talking snakes or burning bushes. And I still don’t know if I believe in myself. I guess that all depends on you.